I am back at work.
It’s been about a month since I was last here and my goodness does it feel good to be back. I’ve been SO bored away from this place, but it was important for my health to take the time off. Mentally I am feeling so much better, the Sertraline has kicked in and I am feeling emotionally stable and haven’t had a panic attack for over a week. OVER A WEEK. I honestly never thought I’d be able to say that again, but here we are. I’m back in the swing of things and that’s where I plan to stay.
Although I was super nervous to come back it was strangely painless walking through the doors again. I felt relief knowing I wouldn’t be missing more days of work, knowing that I’ve overcome a really difficult period of time in my life and come out the other side. Although things aren’t perfect as of yet I am definitely heading in the right direction and should be back to my old self within months. Although older and slightly wiser.
Most people think it would be great to be off work for an entire month but believe me it’s so boring and you spend most of it missing your colleagues and your work. Al least that’s how it was for me. Suddenly you have no obligations and you’re not expected to do anything which makes it easier to do, well, nothing. I genuinely feel like I wasted an entire month of my life even though I was spending it healing and getting better.
Here’s my advice to you: don’t rush going back to work, that will only lead to even more time off. Take the time to heal and look after yourself, but also don’t leave it too long. It could become almost too easy to take more and more time off and not go back at all. It’s important to acknowledge when you’re getting better and realise that it’s time to go back.
It’s taken me a long time to get here and I am so thankful for all the help and support I have received from everyone around me during this illness. Let’s hope that this is it now, at least for a very very long time. If you’re going through something similar please share your story below! I’d love to have a chat.