Learning to live life for you is a tricky concept if you’re used to living for other people’s approval. For me this has come in the form of worrying far too much what people think of me. Instead of accepting the last piece of pizza that no one else was going to eat I always rejected it in the fear of being deemed “greedy” or “fat”. If I was out with someone who didn’t finish their meal/didn’t get another drink I’d do the same as them in fear of being judged.
It’s hard to get over this. I guess as you get older you learn to care less what others think of you, however, I suffer from anxiety so it’s become a struggle for me again recently. I find myself refusing food more and more or not getting another drink even though I want one or even staying silent in the fear that others will think what I’m saying is weird.
Here’s the truth. A lot of what I say IS weird, but that’s okay. Sometimes I am greedy and want the last piece of pizza (deal with it) and yes, I will drink more alcohol than you. I don’t care. Because that’s what I want to do. Why should I put my fun on hold because I’m worried about what someone else thinks of me? I shouldn’t. Life’s too short to live by imaginary rules that don’t benefit anyone.
What we’ve got to remember is that we feel this way because society has put pressure on us to live by certain rules. Now I’m not suggesting that you go crazy or anything, but just don’t stop living because someone else has told you to or made a nasty comment towards you.
Don’t go around naked or anything (that would be bad advice as you could be done for indecent exposure) and don’t break any laws. Just have the confidence to stand up for yourself and what you believe in. Show people that you aren’t afraid to be your best self and remind them that they can be their best selves too.
A good way to get this done is to set yourself daily goals, like “today I am going to have 2 drinks when my friends have 1” or “I am going to have the 3pm chocolate treat”. If you do it in short doses eventually your mindset will change to comply with it full time.
Do you live your life for you?
Please share your stories below.