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Boundaries are important in every aspect of your life, but especially when you’re dating. It’s vital that you set boundaries early on so that you aren’t stuck in a situation that makes you uncomfortable. However, it’s important to note that it’s never too late to introduce boundaries into a relationship either. It could be the difference between a long, happy relationship and a short one. To know what boundaries to set, first, we must understand what boundaries are and how they can protect us.
What Are Boundaries
A boundary, in this scenario, is a sort of invisible line between you and the other person. It can protect your physical space, feelings, and needs. It can even help you with your responsibilities i.e. saying no if you don’t have the time instead of saying yes because you feel obligated.
How Can Boundaries Protect Us
There are many ways that boundaries protect us. This is so important if you’re on dating sites because we need to protect ourselves when we’re meeting strangers or people we don’t know well. Boundaries give us the power to choose what makes us feel comfortable or safe and demand that others play by those rules. If they don’t agree to those rules, or you can’t find a good compromise it’s time to move on and find someone who will compromise as much as you will.
What Boundaries Should We Be Setting In Our Relationship?
How Often You Communicate
Some people are happy texting all day every day, but others are either overwhelmed by that or have jobs etc. to focus on and can’t respond often. This is why it’s important you discuss where you communicate such as text, messenger or WhatsApp, etc., or a Bedfordshire Dating site and how often. If you prefer no texting and a long phone call at the end of the day, tell them and find a middle ground that suits you both.
This is the most important one. You should be upfront about your intentions in the relationship because if you want marriage and kids, but your other half doesn’t…it just won’t work. Setting boundaries is also important though. You don’t want a proposal 3 months into a relationship (unless you do, then fair play). Talk about getting married and make sure the other person knows you want it, but not straight away.
How Much Time You Spend Together
I don’t know about you, but in the past, I’ve had people who completely overstep this boundary. They will turn up on your doorstep with no prior warning so you can’t turn them away or constantly pressure you to hang out with them. This is a very important boundary. If you’re an introvert or don’t like socialising often it may be good to set a boundary of only hanging out once a week at the beginning of a relationship.
The Physical Stuff
Do you feel uncomfortable with public displays of affection, or want to save the physical stuff for when you know the person a little better? There is no shame in that, but the boundary has to be set from day one. If they really like you they will respect that you maybe aren’t comfortable with being physical straight away and they will be willing to wait. However, some people can’t wait and if they can’t then maybe you aren’t right for each other. Please don’t do anything you aren’t comfortable with, especially physically.
If you implement all of these online dating should be a real joy and you can find the love of your life, or just a fun time.
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